Anti-Social Media

Something good, every day.

Dis / Courage

This year I promised myself I would write. No matter how painful it is, I am going to write and post here at least once a week. And here I am, on the final day of the first week of the year with nothing written.

One of the things that keeps me from writing and posting is that I’m afraid that what I have to contribute isn’t valuable. I constantly feel that my ideas, everything I think and say and write, has already been thought and said and written better by someone else, so what’s the point?

I don’t know what to do with that fear. Because in spite of feeling like my words are not unique or original, I still want to share what’s in my heart and my mind.

If the fear and feelings are untrue, then I’m just sabotaging myself, holding myself back. I need to get out of my own way and just write and hit publish.

And if they are true, if I don’t have anything of value to contribute, then maybe I need to find a way to get over it and just write and hit publish anyway. So what if I’m not unique? Who cares if my ideas don’t matter? I won’t be the first person flinging words into the void of the internet and I certainly won’t be the last.

I suspect the solution is to just go for it. Write something. Anything. Make an effort. Be myself. Stop overthinking everything! Oh wait, that is me. This whole angsty and annoying post is so me. Fuck it. I’m posting it anyway.

Practice. This is my practice. I’m not asking for anyone’s attention. No one is paying me for this. I am only accountable to myself. Yes, I want to do a good job. I want to do my best. But doing nothing because my best isn’t perfect, or even all that original, isn’t helping anyone, certainly not me. That attitude has never gotten me anywhere except stuck.

So, here’s to a new year and getting unstuck.

Courage, my word, it didn’t come, it doesn’t matter
Courage, it couldn’t come at a worse time
The Tragically Hip – “Courage”

Who knows what the future holds?

A year ago today, Bee and I boarded a plane in Edmonton, Alberta, with a carry-on bag each and four 50-lb boxes in the cargo hold: the sum total of all of our worldly possessions.

In the days and weeks previous we gave some of our stuff to friends and family, sold a few items on kijiji and donated a lot to Goodwill. It wasn’t the first time either of us had downsized, and I’m sure it won’t be the last, although it might be a while before we go that small again.

Most people thought we were crazy, stupid or brave. I suppose we were a bit of each. We knew we needed a change, we wanted something different, and we hoped for a fresh start.

And here we are, one year later, settling in to Sackville, New Brunswick, a town I knew nothing about a year ago. The many stops in between were all part of the adventure. It wasn’t perfect, but I can honestly say that I’m glad we made the move.

We had big plans, but they were big, vague plans. We thought we knew what we wanted, but we discovered we were wrong about a lot of it. Our intentions were good though, and I think that’s how we’ve managed to end up here, unexpected, but awesome.

We have a place that feels like home. From the cozy little rental house we chanced upon, in the community that has plenty for us to discover, to the beautiful surrounding area, we are home again.

I am so grateful for the love we have and the life that we continue to create together on a daily basis, year after year. I am so thankful for our friends and family who have supported us through this enormous change.

To all the ups and downs of this past year, thank you. Thank you for getting me here, today. I can’t wait to find out what happens next.

Cranberry Apple Chutney

I’ve been putting off making veggie sausages and mashed potatoes with gravy since we used up the last of my mom’s homemade chutney. Seriously, chutney is the best condiment to have with vegan bangers and mash.

I have also had a bag of frozen cranberries in my freezer for way too long. I was planning to make some cranberry sauce, but then I started to wonder, “can you make chutney with cranberries?”

The answer should be obvious by now…

All of my food questions undergo extensive (or super lazy) google searching, and the chutney query was no exception. I found a few recipes, but nothing sounded quite like what I was looking for. You know, me, with all of my prior chutney-making experience (fact: I have never made chutney before).

No matter. This is what I do with recipes. I find something that sounds good and customize it for my own taste.

Success! It’s delicious. Bee loves it too. And the best part was that it was really easy to make. Chop a few things, measure some stuff, mix it all together and cook until it’s done. It really is that simple!

I can’t wait to share this with friends and family this winter!

Cranberry Apple Chutney

The ultimate autumn sauce. A sweet-savoury-spicy addition to your fall and winter gatherings. Use in place of cranberry sauce and as a condiment on crackers, sandwiches or savoury dishes.

Ingredients

2 apples, peeled and chopped
1 cup cranberries, fresh or frozen
⅓ cup raisins
½ cup onion, diced
2 Tablespoons celery, chopped fine
¼ cup apple cider vinegar
⅓ cup brown sugar
1 ½ Tablespoons ginger, freshly grated
1 ½ teaspoons cinnamon
½ teaspoon mustard seeds
⅛ teaspoon red pepper flakes
⅛ teaspoon ground cloves

Instructions

Mix everything in a medium saucepan.
Bring to a boil over medium-high heat.
Reduce heat to medium-low, cover and cook at a low simmer for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.
Remove the lid and cook for a few more minutes to reduce any remaining liquid.
Enjoy!

Notes

Chutney can be kept in a sealed jar or container in the refrigerator for at least two weeks. I’ve kept it much longer.

Cranberry Apple Chutney in a bowl close-up — Yummy!

This recipe was adapted from Apple Cranberry Chutney on Simply Recipes.

If you make this, I’d love to know what you think. Did you add or remove anything to suit your taste?

Remember. And Love.

I cannot remember the last time I was at a Remembrance Day ceremony. It must have been in Elementary School?

But today is the 100th anniversary of the end of WWI. And that seems like something worth paying attention to.

Plus, we just moved to the east coast, and out here, this is a big deal.

So we went. And we communed. It was good. And it wasn’t. And now I remember why I don’t attend Remembrance Day ceremonies.

I’ve always been conflicted about this day. I still am. But in this time of rampant Us/Them mentality, I can’t help thinking that it’s important to shine a light on the absolute destruction and devastation this kind of thinking gets us. All of us. The human race “US”. Forget “THEM”. They do not exist. WE are all in this together.

We are one people and we have one planet. We need to find a way to take care of it and each other. We need to work together. All of us.

Love is the way. Love when we hurt. Love when we disagree. Love because we can and because it is the only way through.

How do we love? We listen. We try to understand. We care about others. We help. We think. We communicate. We look deeply into each other’s eyes. Sometimes we turn the other cheek. We mourn. We remember.

May you find love and peace.

Hallowe’en Killjoy

I don’t really have anything against All Hallows’ Eve, I just can’t get into it anymore. Maybe it’s because I’m a crotchety old lady and don’t have kids. Maybe it’s because I have serious issues with the consumption of vast quantities of overly-packaged, mass-produced, poor-quality junk food (i.e. “treats”). Wait, maybe I do have something against Halloween…

It’s fun to dress up, but I don’t really enjoy parties. I hate spending money on plastic junk and things I don’t need like costumes, make-up and decorations.

We live in a house on a quiet street in a nice small town. Most of our neighbours have decorated their yards and houses for the occasion, and I’m pretty sure there will be kids out trick-or-treating on this block tonight.

I even caved last week and bought some candy to hand out in case they do come to the door. But I’m secretly hoping they won’t. I might even hide in the basement with the lights out and eat the candy myself (bad idea). Or maybe I’ll send it to work with Bee tomorrow (much better idea).

I don’t know why I feel bad about not wanting to participate in these so-called traditions, but I do.

UPDATE November 1, 2018

Guess what? I was worried about nothing (no surprise there)! I was ready with candy and loonies, I even dressed all in black (not difficult, considering my wardrobe), and although I didn’t exactly make the place inviting, I did not hide the fact that I was home. And… nothing.

Umm… Marsha? It’s not 1988. Parents don’t send their children out to run the roads and bother strangers, not even on Hallowe’en. You just moved here, you don’t know anyone with children, your house isn’t decorated and your outside lights don’t work. Not appealing to trick-or-treaters. If kids around here even do that anymore. After all, it’s not 1988.

So, once again, a tale of me overthinking something and getting anxious for no reason. Will I ever learn?

Coffee Talk – Just Us!

Eating local, shopping local and buying local is important to me. I try to be mindful in all of my spending habits, and I tend to prioritize local over things that “come from away.”

Although I must admit that I won’t necessarily go without something if I can’t get it locally, and my frugality tends to rear it’s thrifty head over certain things.

Sackville, NB does not have a local coffee roaster, at least not one that I’ve found so far (I just moved here this month). But the local grocers do sell Just Us! Coffee from Grand Pré, NS. It checks off the organic and fair trade boxes and is reasonably priced. While it’s not exactly “local,” it’s at least from the maritimes.

Bee and I are home brewers (there’s that frugality!) and make coffee in our french press or aeropress from fresh ground beans pretty much every morning. In the summer I love cold brew coffee, but cooler autumn mornings are upon us, so we’ve moved on to hot coffee.

Speaking of cold brew, I don’t think we will ever beat the fantastic beans that Kat from Meeting Waters Coffee in Tatamagouche, NS custom roasted for us for our very brief stint serving Cottage Cold Brew at the Pugwash, NS Farmers’ Market this summer. That was the best coffee ever. Unfortunately it’s a lot harder for us to get out to Tata since we moved to Sackville, NB.

Marsha & Bee (Cottage Cold Brew) at Pugwash Farmer's Market — Me & Bee serving Cottage Cold Brew at the Pugwash Farmers’ Market 2018

We are on our third lb of whole bean coffee from Just Us! and we’ve had mixed results. Bee and I both like a dark roast, but we couldn’t resist trying one of the medium roasts because it smelled so good. I drink mine black; Bee usually adds homemade cashew cream and brown sugar.

My completely biased thoughts:

Atlantic Blend

Medium Roast

I really wanted to like this, but I just don’t. The name is just maritimey enough to appeal and the aroma from the air valve was heavenly, but the taste didn’t live up to the smell. Too bad!

My rating: 2 beans out of 5.